Sunday, June 5, 2011

The aftermath

Thank you to all those who have given words of support, encouragement and love, in person, as well as through this blog, through emails, cards and phone calls.

While emotionally I'm still up and down, physically I'm doing well. But it seems my body, or maybe my brain, doesn't realise I don't need to nest. Which is what I would have been be doing in these next weeks if our baby was still alive.

The kitchen is my nesting place of choice.
Recently I have made a version of these pizza puffs, bread rolls, my healthier version of chocolate crackles, gingerbread shapes, peppermint patties except I made them with honey and raspberry, cherry bites, a healthier version of cherry bites, broccoli and cashew soup, chicken stock, pizza for dinner, breakfast bars and fruit leather. Tonight I'm going to make raw cream caramels. And the kitchen is always cleaned once I'm finished....not normal.

I'm not eating most of it though, I'm going strict paleo for now. And I can't feed it all to my family at once either, so the freezer is starting to bulge.

Strange. I just have this urge to make food.
Or maybe it's something I'm doing to fill in the baby void.

Got to find a new hobby soon.


Kath Lockett said...

If cooking helps, cook away. Maybe your neighbours will benefit if your own freezer is now full?

It'll take time Cat. Be kind to yourself and enjoy some of the food you're cooking, okay?

ms lottie said...

Arrrgh, no dairy?! Sorry, couldn't do it, but good on you for giving it a shot (but did you resist the caramels?). I agree with Kath - if it helps then cook away, dear sis. xxx

Louisa said...

I wish we lived closer to you so we could give you hugs in person. I seem to have lost the urge to cook recently due to our bereavements, but maybe I should try it again and see if it helps. Your nieces and nephew send you love, kisses and lots of big hugs. xxoxx

Ma Bacon said...

I want to say I'm so very sorry for the loss of your baby boy. I found you though your link to my site for the pizza puffs (I'm ma bacon). I want to offer my ((HUGS)). In Jan. 2010 we lost our baby girl to trisomy 18 at almost 18wks. I know the feelings you are going though. cooking is my comfort too. My thoughts go out to you and your family.

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