Thursday, June 9, 2011

One of those moments

I had one of those moments last night when I just futilely wished that things were different. That things were not what they were right then.
Followed by a feeling of hopelessness that things will ever be 'right' again.
It's not great, knowing that time is the only thing that will lessen that feeling.

And in the rational corner of my mind, I do realise that things will be 'right' again sometime........... just that it will be a slightly different sort of right.


On the kitchen front, I have discovered my 'urge to cook' is more like a' compulsion to cook'. I find myself digging through my recipe folders to find that elusive whatever-it-is recipe that I must make right then.
Since my last post, I have made more broccoli soup, anzac biscuits, graham crackers in teddy bear shapes, a giant pot of butter chicken curry, chocolate syrup, lemon butter and this afternoon I'm set to make some bread sticks and dip, and a huge amount of mini meatballs for the freezer.
The kids don't even like meatballs.

And see what happens when you get distracted for a minute while making chocolate syrup?



ms lottie said...

I know that no comment I ever leave is going to make you feel better, but I'm going to keep on commenting so that you know we think about you everyday.

ms lottie said...

Okay, Lottie here, don't know if last comment worked or not - I'm having problems. But I wanted to say that even though I know nothing I can type will make it all go away, I'm going to keep (trying) to commenting so you know that we think about you every day.

Louisa said...

Echoing the feelings of Miss Lottie, we are thinking of you every day. All five of us are sending you virtual hugs and hope that we can give you real ones sometime soon.

Cat J B said...

Thanks, sisters....don't stress too much about commenting, writing makes me feel a wee bit better, but I'm only doing it right now when I feel down. So all my angst comes out here. There are good days, but tears come upon me at unexpected times.

Kath Lockett said...

Cat darling, you're cooking, you're blogging and you're photographing your boil-over mistakes - they're all fantastic signs in my (not very expert but heartfelt) book!

You're doing brilliantly well and no-one would begrudge you *any* what-if or if-only or why-me moments. No-one.

Cat J B said...

Thanks Kath, I think I'm doing ok overall too. If I pretended everything was ok, then the worrying should start. I'm doing my fair share of wallowing and I think it's doing me good. Still cooking up a storm though :)

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